Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
