i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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