What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
