i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
