fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
