I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
