At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
