So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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