38 yer olds are good kisserssss
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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