its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
