next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
