Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
