you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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