I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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