i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
