He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize