Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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