oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
