She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
