S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
