You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
