i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
