I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
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