why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
