Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
