I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
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