Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize