what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
