he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
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