I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
