im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
