The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize