Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
