So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
