He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize