gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
