My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
