I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize