Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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