i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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