If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
