Just fell off a train. Bad.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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