Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
She announced her abortion via fbk
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
