she woke up with a sticky ear
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
