My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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