Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
