No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
