pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Randomize
