He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
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