don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Randomize
