why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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